Friday, December 16, 2005

9 - Blair Longley and the Marijuana Party.

Previous Posts - 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

I think the Marijuana Party is what truly defines the North American split (if you leave Mexico out of North America). Since I don’t know anything about Mexico I’ll pretend only Canada and the USA are in North America for this post. In Canada, we have a political party that runs candidates for Federal Office based solely on the premise of legalizing marijuana. In the USA if you come out pro-pot I think they deport you to Mexico. In the USA you’ve basically chosen a side in the war on drugs. Here we let the potheads run for the House of Commons. Here people get fines and mostly just warnings if they are found with a bit of pot, in the States I’m told you get possession of narcotics charges. So if your going to get charged with possession of narcotics why not get caught with a barrel of heroin instead of a gram of weed?

The Marijuana Party is great, sad and hilarious. They manage to live up to stereotypes but they’re also making a point. If so many people are smoking marijuana already are the laws working? They tried to ban alcohol and that only saw a rise in organized crime who decided to fill the hole in the market. Same goes for weed. Legalize it and suddenly the criminal element no longer making a profit when government sponsored weed hits the shelves. But then you see the weed crew and laugh. It’s hard to take them serious and they don’t particularly want to be taken serious so the issue is a no brainer. Dude, isn’t a brainer when somebody blows smoke up your nose?

At least the logo isn’t a maple leaf, although I have seen Canadian flags that replace the maple leaf with a pot leaf. Whatever. The slogan is totally awesome – “Let’s roll!” I appreciate that type of humour. We need more in politics.

Now the thing about these guys is that Kevin Smith has already made comics about them and parodied them enough in Bluntman and Chronic as well as his various Clerks spinoffs. All the funny stuff you can think about the Marijuana Party is probably true. They forget when deadlines are and don’t get on the ballot. They forget that they need to actually collect signatures to get on the ballot, and they forget that the signatures need to be in the riding and from eligible voters. They stink of pot and b.o. when you meet them and probably have beards and/or piercings.

Who really cares though? They exist and manage to run a handful of candidates every elections. Is it due to their leader Mr. Longley? I doubt it. This guy looks more interested in the balloons that running a political party. He probably claims to be a Rastafarian and that the pot laws discriminate against his religion. He’s as much a Rastafarian as I am Hindu. He smokes pot, I eat Indian food, it isn’t a religious conversion. Still, they’re fun. I wish they got invited to debates and stuff. I’d actually watch debates with the Marijuana Party candidates. I’d sit in the audience eating chocolate bars or something to distract them. I guess the whole, they’re right but probably spend more time being paranoid about bullshit ideas they have from spending too much time stoned and sitting in a couch with the same people thing makes me be dismissive.

So what’s my conclusion here? They’d be shitty superheroes, but could be a great guest star or something. They’re cute in that unwashed, want to make politics as bitchin’ as their mixed tapes, kind of way. They’re the political party that gets the munchies whenever pork-barrel politics is mentioned. Not only do they want to lead the unwashed masses, they are unwashed masses. And, um, I didn’t manage to really say anything funny on this post. I wasted its potential, just like this party does with itself.

Superhero Name: Weed-wacko
Super Powers: Can inhale and hold breath for indeterminate periods of time. They got ideas that would totally blow your mind, man
Weaknesses: Bright shiny objects, colours, food, well anything to tempt the senses really.
Superhero Team: The Pot Heads.
Overall Rating: C+

1 comment:

Sony Ericsson Takes Over Title said...

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This is a little info for people that want to learn of bongs.
This info is more extensive than this but you can get a superficial idea reading this and
Avoid mistake when you’re starting to use it.
• The base is filled with water to the depth dictated by the bong. Water quality can include use of tap water, which may promote mineral buildup, or distilled water, which deposits less residue on the smoking equipment and is easier on lungs. Sometimes other liquids are used, e.g., lime water, giving the smoke a different taste. More rarely, liquids like Coca-Cola and herbal teas are used. However, such liquids can make cleaning difficult and time-consuming.
• The substance to be smoked is packed into the bowl and ignited. Cigarette lighters and matches are commonly used for ignition. Packing the bowl is a balance between filling it with enough substance to create a useful amount of smoke and leaving enough room for air to be sucked through the substance.

When inhaling, the volume of the lungs increases, causing the air in the lungs to decrease in pressure. The air in the lungs is then at a lower pressure than the air in the atmosphere. The pressure difference causes a flow of air from outside of the bong through the bowl picking up smoke from the burning substance. The smoke then bubbles through water and on into the chamber where it is temporarily held. Once the chamber is full to the smokers desired capacity, the hole above the water level is uncovered, either the bowl is pulled out of the stem, or, in bongs with an attached bowl a "carb" or "Shotgun" (a small hole that is covered by the thumb) is uncovered and the smoke is inhaled into the lungs. Once in the lungs, the active chemicals in the smoke are absorbed into the blood stream.
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